Thursday 29 October 2009

The Road

Finished "The Road" by Cormac McCarthy today. I'm a sucker for post apocalyptic stuff.
Leaning towards giving it 5 out of 5. The only slight criticism was I sometimes got confused over who was saying what, the author breaking with convention and not bothering to trifle with speech marks or the verb "said".
I got his number on that though - he was trying to mirror the end of the world, the breakdown in society, by dumping the normal rules. What's the point in speech marks if the world's a smoking ruin and the survivors are going around eating each other?

For about 10 minutes I was really smug about this revelation, then I discovered the author just couldn't be arsed in putting them in.

A new hope?

Today I am unemployed.
No. That's wrong.
Today I'm on holiday.
November the 12th, that's when I'll be jobless.

But that's not right either. By then I'll be full time author! Professional wordsmith. Except that's crap too. Need to be published for that accolade. For that I guess I should finish a piece of work, then launch it, like some young sparrow on its first faltering flight. And just hope it doesn't get taken out in a flurry of feathers by a passing falcon.

A friend of mine thinks it won't be long before I'm wearing a tracksuit and eating chips in John Frost Square with all the other scallies. She is way wrong though. The riverbank is the place to be seen.

She's been saving all the 2-4-1 subway vouchers and cheap pizza meal deals that come her way, and my mum keeps telling me I can come for a meal any time, dropping hints that no member of the family has ever been unemployed.
I keep saying to her I'm a writer.
Watch her shoulders sag a little.
Of course you are dear, she says.



Task for the day: look up the meaning of "alliteration"
Task for the week: buy a tracksuit

Monday 12 October 2009

Things I've used in pitched battles with Brian

  • A bag of nuts
  • Two double mattress size inflatable beds, inflated (Totally forgotten this (or blanked out) until now. We emerged from the basement, red faced and panting)
  • About three dozen bananas
  • Some rancid strawberries
  • Grapes
  • Plain water, bottled
  • Coffee dregs
  • Some kind of rubber ball (not sure if this counts. He once launched it towards me just as I was welcoming my girl friend into the office. She doesn't like Brian much)
  • Half a baguette, ham.
  • Slice of toast, taped to the underside of this desk
  • Some of these
  • A couple of these. Note: Firing these repeatedly against the ceiling where your office is not on the top floor is not recommended.
  • I still miss Brian

    So many of the people I used to work with have gone to better places. One of these was Brian.

    This is an old post from my first "blog"

    A fairly typical email exchange


    Brian emails me to ask for my help with something.

    My reply

    Rearrange these words:

    "I don't fuck a give"

    His reply

    Don't bother rearranging these:

    "James is a fucking tosser"


    Removing the blogger toolbar

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    height:0px;

    visibility:hidden;

    display:none

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    Stick it in just before the

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    Bit in your html


    Ta Mr R

    I've been shamed

    I discovered something amazing today.
    My friend and colleague - Mr Phil Ruse - has a blog.
    Not only that but it's over 2 years old.
    He even posts stuff to it. He's posted stuff this month.
    It looks good. It has funny pictures. It has opinions. It's made me laugh.

    And then here's me. Part time software engineer, part time writer. Stuck in my shell, terrified by the thought that the novel I've been writing for the past year is actually a little bit shit.

    So here it is - my own blog. I can't promise pictures, or opinions, or even humour (though I do have a post about slugs lined up), but at least it's some words that someone, somewhere, might actually read.

    Oh yeah, shout out to Mr Phil Ruse - http://www.philruse.com/. Would have discovered it earlier but he hid it well.